What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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