he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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