i don't like sucking hair
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
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