he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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