I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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