Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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