OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
We don't watch enough power rangers
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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