he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
