We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
