I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
