Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
