i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
