I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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