Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Edward fifth and chaser hands
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
