Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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