its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I think i peed on brittanys purse
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize