did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize