sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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