You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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