This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
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