You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
