he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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