At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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