it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i will never coherently bang her
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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