You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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