Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
