mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
