Four minutes until I can fart!
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
don't judge my taste in strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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