we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize