i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
