tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize