dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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