I wish my penis had an off switch
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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