at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
