Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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