You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
this boner is exhausting
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
