the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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