whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
