what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
