did you get engaged???
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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