You're completely useless in the revolution.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
So here I am, sexting at work.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
