so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Is it because I queefed?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
