Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize
