You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
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