i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
