If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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