If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
