What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
