Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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