We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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