Will you blow on my dice?
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
